Fireworks, birdtables & gratitude - how they can all help
So a few weeks ago I was at a bonfire night event watching the fireworks.
Behind me was a young girl sitting on her parent's/grandparent's shoulders. Amongst all the usual oohs and aahs she suddenly said: "I'm so lucky I've got eyes."
It was such a sweet and innocent thing to say and really got me thinking about a lot of things.
First of all about gratitude; trying to practice the art of turning our attention towards the things that we have - rather than focusing on the things that we lack whether these be material or more related to ourselves and our view of ourselves.
Also, how often we can miss what is there as we are noticing what is absent.
A simple act that you can take to practice the skill of noticing the positives is completing a positive data-log each day.
Start out by logging three positive things you can notice and be grateful for them. These don't have to be big things but they're just about us starting to notice what is present.
Examples for me would be:
1. Enjoying watching the birds use the quirky bird table I recently bought.
2. I made a pot of loose-leaf peppermint tea today and was grateful that I had the time to sit and drink it.
3. I met a new person at work who seems friendly.
Try practising this for a week, doing it on a daily basis. It's a great way of retraining the brain to notice the good stuff that's present.
So back to bonfire night.
The other thing it made me think is how the little girl was fully present with what was happening and she was enjoying the fireworks and acknowledging that it was being able to see them that was making the event enjoyable for her.
There is something really useful about practising being present and it's not a skill we are always good at.
Anxiety can tend to make us mentally rush into the future, panicking, worrying and imagining the worst case scenario.
Depression can make us mentally ruminate over the past - rehashing decisions, regretting choices and can often be quite self-critical.
It can be really helpful to practice the skill of being just in the present moment. Being with the 'what is' rather than the 'what ifs'.
This is something that you can practice by using a simple technique such as feeling the floor under your feet and just connecting with what's happening in each moment.
Practice the art of noticing if you are mentally in the past or the future and gently escorting your attention back to the present moment.
Spending a few seconds focusing on the breath can often be beneficial too, as the breath is always a present mine not act.
You can't be breathing yesterday's or tomorrow's breath, you can only be breathing each individual breath you are breathing.
The third thing this girl made me think about was the way the children view things without judgement, without attaching stories or meanings, simply seeing things with curiosity and interest. This is a skill we can lose as we get older and experience some of the knocks that life can give to us.
We can often tend to view things through a cynical or negative perspective. Try to practice viewing things through a child's eyes experiencing the wonder and interest of each experience as if for the first time.
It was interesting to me to notice how a few words from this girl set off a whole chain of thoughts and that learning can often come from areas where we may least expect it.
Try practising one or all of the things discussed above. Try to practice them with a sense of kindly curiosity and see what arises for you.